I have been gearing up for my October Unprocessed Challenge. It has been a week and a half since I stepped back onthe scale and got the begeesus scared out of me. I have wrtten everythign down and I have goten ont he scale every day. The improvement has been dramatic! I am down almost 8 lbs in the week and a half. I hope to be down the entire 13 by October 1 when the challenge begins again.
I've thought about relationships a lot lately my relationships with food, family, friends, and myself. They're all tied together. It has been a difficult process learning to live alone again and enjoy life with myself, having only myself to rely on. Food got to be so comforting when I hurt. A bowl of popcorn with double butter helped when I missed Jon. I found a body pillow helped with those feelings. I could snuggle up with it rather than have a sandwich. When I start to get cravings, I slip on his old nightshirt and feel him with me.
I now keep a stock of Hallmark movies on the DVR for the nights I want to cry. I'm down to about one night a week with a movie and box of Kleenex. This past weekend I watched Pollyanna and cried my eyes out. It hurt and it felt good. Maybe by the time the next year passes I will beable to turn off the movies. I hope so.
:) do you have room to store a bike? I have found that no matter how rotten I feel or how much I am MISSING everyone and all that I've lost in the past 5 years, a bike ride makes me feel better. I can feel the stress just falling off; my mind starts to calm down; a few deep breaths shoves all that oxygen into my lungs and i feel that all things are possible again...if just for a little while.
ReplyDeleteUm, well. Um, yes, I have a bike in the closet of my tiny studio apartment. The tires are flat right now. It's right next to the sax I'm not playing (another love I have been neglecting).
ReplyDeletehmmm i have this great image of you riding your bike, balancing perfectly without holding the handlebars..why? because you are PLAYING your SAX while you are riding your bike! whooo hoooooo! and the stress is clumped in piles behind you on the road!
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